Wednesday, January 06, 2010

GOLD!

GOLD!



You need GOLD! Without it, you simply don't have any money! Trust me, G. Gordon Liddy convicted felon radio star! You must have GOLD! Today! The American dollar is on the decline and GOLD! is on the rise! If you don't have GOLD! you're a piece of shit! My mustache makes me seem less slimy! Put your trust in GOLD!

GOLD!


The America I once knew is dead. We are now ruled by tyrants who will soon be kicking down your door and hauling you off to a prison. That is, unless you have GOLD. You see, the dollar is officially worthless now and soon we will be resorting back to horse trading. The once constant we'll have is GOLD. You should just trade in your cash dollars now for either GOLD or livestock, because in 12 months, that's all there will be: GOLD and cattle. Everything else will be 100% worthless. Trust me, I cry a lot.

GOLD!


At the b'hest of Her Majesty the Royal Queen of the Kingdom, verily we hath slain the Dragon Lord and claimed our just r'ward! And dids't thou know that GOLD is the very r'ward of which I doth speak? For to p'rchase a fine Shield of Silver or sturdy Plate Mail with which to combat ones foes, the Smitty doth r'quire ones p'rchase to be made in GOLD. Speak not of dollars or euros or rupees, for the finest of armaments, one must obtain GOLD!


GOLD!



AARRRR!! GOLD is what we seek on the high seas! For GOLD is the bounty which we pillage and loot unsuspecting sloops that cross our waterways! GOLD! Avast ye swarthy landlubbers it is the Pirates' GOLD that commands the Spanish Armada at my beck and call! Yar!!!!!!!! I don't be seein' that happening with your filthy, stinking dollars or yen! You'll be laughed right back to port if you don't have GOLD!


GOLD?!


Hee hee hee!!! Sooo it is the spinning wheel that spins GOLD! that you want, eh! Well, my pretty little girl, you may have my spinning wheel of GOLD! Hee hee hoo hoo! BUT, you must answer me a simply riddle, little child! Hee hee! You must tell me my name! Yes! YES! You must tell me my name and this magical spinning wheel shall be yours! Then you can have all the GOLD your heart desires! But you have merely three days to guess my name! If you fail, then you will become mine! Mwu ha ha ha!! Hee hee!!!!!!

GOLD!



Yessir. That's why I'm here. Made my way from Little Rock, Arkansas because I heard there was GOLD rushing through the streams. Done passed through Houston, Lubbock and up through Tuscon to get here, son. You see, I had quite a bad reputation back in Little Rock, but I want to start over with GOLD. GOLD is my only way I'll ever make sumthin' of myself. Then I'll show old pappy who's the fool! Yes, he didn't believe the tales of gold come rushin' down the mountain, but with my GOLD pan and my mule, I'm bound to make it out here.

Gold.



Clearly one of the most precious minerals there are on the planet. As you can see from this periodic table, it has the chemical symbol Au and has an atomic number of 79. In addition it is the most malleable and ductile metal known to man. For this reason it can be especially valuable in electronics. It can also be used to create alloys with other metals, harnessing the power of gold in addition to adding the qualities of other metals, such as iron or mercury. It is also considered one of the "noble metals." This means it is resistant to corrosion or oxidation. Gold. Now your homework tonight is page 73, numbers 11 through 21, odd problems only.

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