Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Better Know a PUMA! A Multiple Choice Quiz

So these PUMA people are getting a good amount of coverage from the media. So if you think you know PUMA, feel free to take this complimentary PUMA quiz. And if you are unsure what a PUMA is, feel free to cheat and look at the answers. So let's get started.

1) PUMA is ....
A) a grassroots organization of disgruntled Hillary supporters.

B) a group of anti-Barack Obama Democrats

C) supporting John McCain
D) pretty damned pathetic.

E) All of the above.

Answer: E) All of the above. The PUMAs are all of those things. They love Hilary. So much so that they won't even listen to her.

2) PUMA claims ...
A) The media portrayed Clinton in an unfair light.
B) Barack Obama is a "registered" Muslim.

C) Barack Obama stole the Democratic primary election by actually winning it.
D) All of the above.

Answer: D) All of the above. Yes, they aren't happy that their person lost and apparently they think that Obama should say, "you know what, just kidding. I actually didn't really want to be president, so here you go."

3) PUMA consists primarily of...
A) Racists
B) Republicans

C) Retards

Answer: Not sure about this one. Although at least if they were racists or Republicans they'd have a congitive excuse for their existence. What's incredible is that the Republican National Comittee is intent on getting them on their side by talking about what a great American Hilary is. Let me repeat that: Republicans are now praising Hilary. Republicans can't fucking stand Hilary. They've spend millions of dollars trashing her specifically. And now the PUMAs are being swayed by the Republican party?

"Look, never mind that I hit your mother with a baseball bat, do you want to be friends now?"

4) PUMA represents ...
A) The white working class.

B) Upset Democrats.
C) 16 people.

Answer: C) 16 people. Yeah, it's hard to find a groundswell of actual support. They claim to have "millions" of members but there's nothing substantiating that. In fact, whenever I see them on TV, it's usually like 4 of them. And the PUMA conference consisted of a few people and a registered Republican.

5) PUMA is based in....
A) a large swath of American territory.
B) New York.

C) Will Bower's basement.

Answer: C. And it's not really relevant, check out this awesome T-shirt.

Pretty effective, eh? Man, I hope I can get one of those shirts before they sell out.

6) When you actually Google "PUMA" which of the following do you see before you actually find a PUMA website.
A) Shoe websites.
B) The wikipedia entry for cougars.

C) An article about Ussain Bolt.

D) Information about the Beijing Olympics in general.

E) A youtube video of a bear fighting a puma.
F) All of the above.

Answer: F) All of the above. In fact, the bear/puma video is pretty awesome. Let's que that up.

Also warrants mentioning that the bear/puma video has about 1.5 million more views than any of the PUMA youtube videos.

7) Given the rather small number of PUMAs and their minimal financial heft the correct reaction by media outlets during the DNC should be ...
A) Feature them and their leader(s) for a few minutes and let them have their brief say.
B) Put them on the screen every 15 minutes and continue to talk about them every hour.

Answer: You'd think that the answer would be A) but apparently FoxNews and MSNBC have different ideas.

8) You probably aren't too smart if ...
A) Chris Matthews makes you look stupid.

B) David Schuster makes you look stupid.

C) Both.

D) Either.

Answer: D). Yet the PUMAs have managed to achieve C). By Matthews and Schuster. And it really wasn't that hard for them. Yesterday Matthews asked a PUMA to verify their claim that Obama was a "registered Muslim" and the PUMA said "Well I'm not going to tell YOU!" Of course.

9) PUMAs want ...
A) Hillary to be president.

B) John McCain to be president.
C) A book deal.

Answer: B) and C). It's been established that most PUMA visitors are probably Republicans who think this is a clever way to make noise. That would imply B). However, anyone that doesn't think the actual PUMA leaders are going to try to push some sort of book that will most assuredly be discredited, you're kidding yourself.

10) The effect PUMA will have on the November election will be ...
A) Significant.

B) Insignificant.

Answer: B) I'm going out on a limb here and saying that the PUMA people are in New York and California primarily. And unless either of those states swing by three or fewer votes, their effect will be negligible.

I hope you enjoyed the BKAP! Quiz. Don't worry, if you didn't do so well there are always retakes.

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