Saturday, March 10, 2007

Is this product really necessary?

Honestly, DMS has so much to blog about these days. And Lord willing with Spring Break, we'll get a chance. There's just so much stuff happening and vitriol to be spread. Everything from the new Arcade Fire album to the results of DMS's fantasy baseball draft. From SXSW happenings to Cobra II. And let's not forget the stunted discussion of The World is Flat.

But I can't get past this.

I mean, cripes, who the fuck needs this?? Isn't that what coffee is? Natural ingredients my ass. I guess cocaine is natural too then.

Look, Dear Mr. Supercomputer is addicted to coffee like never before. We had three cups between 4:00-4:30 PM this afternoon when it was like 85 damned degrees outside. It's literally been months since I've gone a day without the stuff. I get a headache when I don't have it by 9:30 in the morning. But there's no way, I'd ever touch this energy coffee unless I planned on having a heart attack in a half hour.

It's fucking coffee! You don't need to add anything to coffee to make it more energizing. That's like adding extra alcohol to vodka to get more drunk.

If Dear Mr. Supercomputer ever did drink this ghastly concoction, I get the feeling we'd be found a few hours later trying to eat our way through a giant plaster donut.

And in totally unrelated news...

My favorite video of the year so far by Menomena, "Wet and Rusted." Decent song too. Would probably be better after some Fusion Energy Coffee (tm).

No comments: